Tuesday 9th July 2013

It seems Dexter's childish outburst last night was more than an ideal threat and unlike everyone else in Walford, he's actually packed... and more than just an overnight bag... that is quite the miracle.

Sharon returns to a suitable greeting from Shirley, who suggests that she thought she and her oft forgotten son were gone for good "Wishful thinking." replies Sharon as her hair tries to decide how stupid it's going to look this episode (moderate with a possibility of very rising later)... Don't we know it?

Being a comic relief character, Kim has apparently - just as the tedium of Wimbledon is over - decided to rename the B&B... although, it's hard to tell if she's saying that Andy Murray HAS won or is GOING to win because of her poor diction and worse syntax... but these occasional intrusions of the real world are so arbitrary and detached that they stick out like a sore thumb.

Is Tiffany looking different? She's excited for the return of her brother.

Kat makes sure to sensitively ask Jean if she's alright - JUST KIDDING! One off comment and it's "ARE YOU OFF YOUR MEDS?!" in a barely contained shriek that passes for her inside voice and then she seems very surprised that the village mad woman scurries off like a puppy threatened with a rolled up newspaper.

It seems like Ava has chosen her son - definitely the wrong decision... Sam seems to take it rather well though.

Patrick/Cora subplot but the course of true romance doesn't run smooth as Patrick is friends with another woman!

Sharon and Dot are having a chinwag but it turns out that this is just Sharon fishing for a place to stay.

Kat confides in Bianca that Jean is being a village mad woman to which Bianca just shrugs and says she's Jean... such a progressive attitude to mental health issues in Walford... if it was the nineteenth century.

Oh, what's this? A Dexter/Sam scene without shouting?! The bookies will be paying out big on that and it seems Dexter is having second thoughts.

Peter seems to think he can deal with Carl - why? And the idea that it might not have been Carl is floated but immediately dismissed.

Dexter forgets that in the game of fathers, deadbeat dad always loses to dead dad... which you'd think he'd remember given the fact he's had the same exact conversation with Jay a dozen times and Jay's had the same exact reaction each and every time.

Cora really isn't too fond of Patrick's new friend - as she doesn't drink and bakes cakes! DUN DUN DUN!

Sharon reassures Ian that he'll have the restaurant back on track soon and then Ian says he's tired, fearing another breakdown. Then Jean bursts in, only to be yanked back outside by Bianca... and for some reason, Sharon turns down the offer of free accommodation despite needing it. So, she'll go fishing for it from Dot but won't take a freely given offer from her oldest and best friend? That makes sense.

Abi tries to help Dexter by telling her how awful her father is...

Cora gets her marching orders from Patrick who has had enough of her snide comments.

Bianca finally admits that she thinks bipolar disorder renders Jean as stupid as her ex-husband... although, given how mental illness is written in Eastenders that's a lot closer to the truth in Eastenders than it is in reality and then Kat comes in and finds out about the hijinks in the restaurant. The inevitable shouting match ensues as Liam comes home, just as Bianca shows what an insufferable bitch she is... she's not

Having managed without Sharon's management for the past several weeks, it seems only logical that she can walk back into her old job - no questions asked... well, except for "are you clean"?

Peter asks his father if he has talked to Carl and when told the recently released criminal has just backed off ten grand, he IMMEDIATELY believes him... because criminals don't care that much about money!

Dexter walks in to see his mother crying and so begins his mad dash to find Sam... if only some kind of instantaneous long distance communication device had been invented for use in a situation like this!

Bianca assures Liam that the trial for his stabbing will be just fine! They've had all the bad lucky they're going to have.

And... just like that, Sam and Dexter are reconciled... kind of. At least Ava is happy.