Thursday 22nd August 2013

Shirley is stalking Phil, presumably because she found out he was paying her rent.

Cyndi 2 is back to Devon before the end of the episode. Hahaha. Sure.

Shirley confronts Kim and finds out Denise knew too...

Cyndi 2 isn't wanted by Peter or Lucy but she knows about Peter's TERRRRIBLE SECRET!

Pointless Poppy catches Arfuuuuuuuuuuurrrr in a lie. DUN DUN DUN!

Shirley feels out King Phil about her rent but then after he denies it all, she just says she knows... King Phil doesn't want to discuss it in public though.

Jean is concerned about the continued carrot theft.

Abi continues to act all weird and nervous around her sister.

Cyndi 2 and Denise have a conversation, despite the fact they don't know one another. At all. Which is why Cyndi 2 tries to guilt her into talking to Ian and it seems to work.

Phil admits he might still have feelings for Shirley, that's a shock.

Lauren arranges an impromptu party for Abi.

Goodness, Shirley and Phil's problems are down to 'Ev's murder. This entire could have been cut and pasted from whenever Shirley found out.

Pointless Poppy looks set to leave Walford but is intercepted by Tamwar and Alice (who might just be on a half-day).

The tedious allotment storyline grinds on.

Poppy tells Alice about how she lost her job and how Arfuuuuuuuuuur is cheating on him. Cue Arfuuuuuuuuur walking in with a woman and Poppy storms off before Arfuuuuuur can explain that she's just a work colleague and that he's actually been secretly working back at a definitely not dangerously close to copyright infringing fast food restaurant. Who could have seen that shocking twist coming?

Lauren tells Peter he should forgive his sister and then comments how he's always been the golden boy who does no wrong. FORESHADOWING!

Cyndi 2 tries again to stay but Ian has had a long chat with her grandmother!

Pointless Poppy throws herself on Lola's mercy and then gushes to Sadie to try and get her job back and that works like a treat.

To make the allotment  plot worse, it turns out the thief is Mo.

It turns out Cyndi 2 was running away because she didn't want to move house and Ian seems to be taken by this predictable yarn of flattery and faaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmleeeee.

Mo reminds us of what a loathsome character she is and how her absence from the screen enriches the programme, blackmailing Jean into get DCI The Bill not press charges.

Shirley and Sharon shout at one another until Denise comes in.

The surprise party is sprung on Abi who continues to act all  tense.

Denise talks some sense to Shirley about Phil and she seems to have a complete turn around on her former Phil hating ways.

Abi admits she was lying about her exam results and the puts the blame squarely on Lauren... ah, sisterly love.

Shirley walks into Phil's house (no need to lock doors in crime free Walford). She then tells Phil to think of what she's worth and then treble it. You won't get far on less than a tenner, Shirl.

Oh and despite everyone having spent the entire episode she'd be gone before the credits, guess who's staying "a few more days". Yes, it's Cyndi 2!